Things I will not do at Hogwarts
by ArsenalReal14
Summary: List of things you shouldn't do at hogwarts, with  almost  all your favorite characters. Enjoy :
1. Chapter 1

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts

**AN: Its a random story/list. Just did it for fun. I put it under Katie and Marcus just in case :) Enjoy**

**Disclaimer: Don't own Harry Potter**

1. Tell Ron I had a threesome with Hermione and Ginny.

Harry walked into the great hall and grinned when he saw Ron sitting at the Gryffindor table.

"Hey, Ron," Harry said happily.

"Hey, mate, what's up?"

"I have to tell you something."

"What is it?" Ron asked worriedly.

Harry leaned forward. "I had a threesome with Hermione and Ginny..."

Ron burst up clutching a knife. "You what? That's it! Kiss your discostick good-bye!"

Harry ran out of the great hall, past Ginny, laughing, with Ron running after him, yelling, "I'm cutting off your discostick, Harry!"

* * *

><p>2. Ask Hermione what a discostick is.<p>

Ginny walked into Hermione's room. "Hey, Hermione, what's a discostick?"

Hermione grinned. "Something Justin Bieber doesn't have..."

* * *

><p>3. Ask Angelina Johnson, Alicia Spinnet, and Katie Bell if they ever had a girl-on-girl-on-girl threesome together.<p>

Ron walked towards to the three Gryffindor chasers who were standing outside the quidditch locker room.

"Hello, Angelina, Alicia, Katie."

"Hi," they said.

After a moments silence, Ron said, "Soooo... I been wondering... Have you three ever had a threesome together?"

"Nooo comment..." Angelina said blushing with her two friends...

* * *

><p>4. Sunbathe on the Quidditch Pitch in a bikini, as an attempt to seduce Marcus Flint.<p>

Katie whistled a small tune as she walked onto the quidditch pitch in a red and gold bikini, with a towel under her arm. When she got to the center of the field, she laid the towel on grass and laid down, looking up at the Slytherin Quidditch Captain flying above.

Marcus looked down and saw a half-naked girl laying on the center of the field. Is that... Bell? He flew a little lower and his thoughts were confirmed.

"Hi, Flint!" Katie said waving at him.

"What are you doing?"

"Sunbathing."

"Why?"

"Its a beautiful day. Care to join me, Flint? You can put sun lotion on my back and... Anywhere else you can think of..."

Marcus tried to hide his blush. "You're fourteen, Bell."

Katie shrugged. "So?"

What the?

Katie rolled onto her stomach. "I have the sun lotion. Come down when your ready."

"I have to go, Bell," Marcus said growing hot, then hastily flying away.

Katie grinned. This was a great― AHHHHH!

* * *

><p>5. Nor will I do it when bludgers are around...<p>

* * *

><p>6. I will not challenge Malfoy in an Angry Birds contest.<p>

"Hey! Malfoy!"

"What do you want, Potter?"

"I bet I can beat you in a Angry Birds contest!"

"You're challenging me to an Angry Birds contest? I'll beat you hands down!"

"Bring it on!"

20 Minutes Later...

"Potter, Malfoy! Put the birds away! You both have dentension for two weeks!"

* * *

><p>7. Playing Angry Birds in McGonagall's class is not a good idea.<p>

* * *

><p>8. Neither is writing, "McGonagall pawned me at Angry Birds" 500 times.<p>

* * *

><p>9. Dressing up as a monkey and banana and running through Snape's class.<p>

"That's self-explanatory," Hermione said to applying a cooling potion to Fred and George's burns. "Why did you two do that anyway?"

Fred turned to George before saying, Because it was awesome!"

* * *

><p>10. Stare intently at Graham Montague, feeling up Angelina in McGonagall's class.<p>

Alicia, Fred, George, and Lee watched in amazement, a long with the rest of the class, as Montague placed a hand on Angelina's knee and started making it's way up to Angelina's thigh.

The class leaned forward as his hand got even closer. Pretty soon it was up her skirt, and the whole class fell out of their chairs. McGonagall turned around facing the class and saw them on the floor staring at Angelina and Montague in shock.

McGonagall rolled her eyes. "Mr. Montague, Ms. Johnson, whatever you two are doing together, maybe you should do it in the back of the class, instead of upfront where everyone has a good view."

Angelina and Graham blushed...

**AN: See told you it was random :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Yeahhh... So enjoy the randomness**

**Disclaimer: Don't own Harry Potter**

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 11-20

11. Use the polyjuice potion to disguise ourselves as Crabbe and Malfoy while running down the hallway yelling, "Gay Pride!"

Hermione rolled her eyes and glared darkly at Harry and Ron, who were laughing in the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Thats not what I had in mind!" Hermione said loudly over their laughter.

* * *

><p>12. Ask if Miles Bletchley is really a girl. (<strong>AN: In the first Harry Potter movie Miles was a girl, but in the next movie his character was a boy)<strong>

Malfoy grinned as Miles came walking into the Slytherin common room.

"Hey, Miles, are you really-"

"NO! I'm not a girl! It was a casting error!"

* * *

><p>13. Write "your mom!" and put it into the Goblet of Fire.<p>

"All right!" Dumbledore proclaimed loudly. "Our next champion will be..." He looked at the piece of paper... "Your mom?"

Everyone burst into fits of laughter.

"All right! Who wrote this?"

* * *

><p>14. Try to give Alicia Spinnet a striptease in the Hogwarts Library.<p>

Cassius Warrington walked into the library and stood infront of Alicia and sighed. She looked up.

"Need something, Warrington?" She asked distastefully.

He sighed again and started taking off his clothes, until he was standing there in his underwear. Alicia stared at him, shock and confusion written on her face.

"Are you turned on yet?"

"No."

Warrington walked over and sat down beside her, then pulled Alicia into his lap.

"How 'bout now?"

"Maybe..." Alicia started to blush.

He leaned into her lips. "I need a better answer then that."

"Mr. Warrington, put your damn clothes on this instant!" Madam Pince said, who seemed to appear out of nowhere, and started him with a broom until he was gone.

Alicia was blushing brightly trying to figure out what just happened.

* * *

><p>15. Steal Hermione's underwear and display them in the Gryffindor Common Room.<p>

Hermione smiled when she saw Fred and George run past her, while being chased around by a pack of Monster Books of Monsters, that Hermione trained herself.

"Thats a good trick," Katie said sitting beside Hermione.

"Thanks!"

After a moments silence, Katie said, "Anyway to make them fly?"

* * *

><p>16. Sic a pack of Monster Books of Monsters on Marcus Flint.<p>

Katie walked onto the center of the Quidditch Pitch with a large sack over her shoulder. She put it on the grass and massaged her shoulder. Marcus watched her curiously from above.

"Whats in the sack, Bell?" Marcus asked.

Katie ignored him and opened the sack, dumping out the Monster Books of Monsters. Marcus gave her a confused look, and Katie pointed to Marcus.

"Sic him, boys!"

The pack of books growled and barked. Marcus watched as they started to fly towards him. Marcus took off fast trying to escape the pack of attack books. He could hear Katie laughing.

"BELL!"

* * *

><p>17. Nor will I put them in the showers while Marcus is taking a shower.<p>

Katie started walking back to the castle. She was tired from a long day of Messing with Marcus. She saw the rest of the Slytherin team coming into view.

"Hello, Katie," Warrington said deciding to be on her friendly side.

"Hello, Cassius." Katie knew he had a thing for Alicia and decided to be nice.

"Have you seen Marcus?"

Katie hid her grin. "Well, the last time I saw Marcus, he was-"

"MOVE!"

Marcus pushed past them, with a towel wrapped around his waist, and his hair and body wet and soapy. Behind him was the pack of monster books.

Katie smiled and pat Warrington's shoulder. "Well, I'll see you tomorrow, Cassius. I'll tell Alicia you said, hi."

"Okay." Warrington watched as she walked away...

* * *

><p>18. Before going out onto the Quidditch Pitch, we will not yell, "This. Is. SPARTA!"<p>

"Ready to beat Ravenclaw?" Fred asked the team.

They nodded. The gates opened and the Gryffindor Team yelled...

"THIS! IS! SPARTA!"

* * *

><p>19. Ask Hermione if she didn't mind Lavender Brown kissing Ron.<p>

"NO COMMENT!"

* * *

><p>20. Nor will I ask her how she got hairballs.<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 21-30

21. Calling/Implying Angelina, Alicia, and Katie are sluts while providing Quidditch commentary.

"Another ten points for Gryffindor! Thanks to the beautiful Angelina who scored last night with Graham Montague!"

"Jordan!"

"Sorry, Professor... And another ten points to Gryffindor! Thanks to the beautiful Katie Bell, who isn't only a great chaser, but is also great at bending over for any guy eighteen and up. She learned a lot from Angelina and Alicia!"

"Jordan!"

"Sorry, Professor... Angelina passes the ball to Alicia Spinnet and... She scores! Like in the library with Cassius Warrington!"

"JORDAN!"

"Give me that!" Angelina said grabbing Fred's beater bat. A bludger came down, she hit it... Right at Lee Jordan...

"AHHHHHHHH!" Lee shrieked.

Angelina grinned and gave the bat back to Fred. Katie and Alicia came over and high-fived her.

"Fifty points for the Gryffindor chasers!" Katie said.

"And Lee Jordan zero!"

* * *

><p>22. Ask Harry to buy the new Justin Bieber CD.<p>

"So... Harry... My birthday is coming up..." Ginny said

"What would you like?"

"The new Justin Bieber CD." She smiled, kissed his cheek, and walked away.

Harry sighed. "Malfoy is definitely going to make fun of me now."

* * *

><p>23. I WILL NOT HAVE A TICKLE FIGHT WITH 14-YEAR-OLD KATIE FREAKIN BELL!<p>

Marcus sat in the library writing his report for potions class. Katie smiled and sat beside him.

"Hi, Marcus!" Katie said happily.

He ignored her. He was still A LITTLE mad at Katie for putting Monster Books of Monsters in the shower.

"You're probably mad about the killer books, soooo... To get back at me, I'll let you do whatever you want to me." Katie tried not to sound hopeful.

Marcus couldn't help but grin at her cuteness. "No."

Katie looked shocked. "You're not going to get me back? Come on, I'll be your personal slave! Don't you want that?"

Marcus smirked. "Yes, but you're fourteen... And whiney."

"I am not whiney!" Katie pouted and started hitting him playfully.

Marcus laughed and started playfully hitting her too. Then Katie's small fist came in contact with his stomach, making Marcus jump.

"What was that?" Katie said laughing at his reaction.

"What? I'm ticklish."

Katie grinned and started tickling him.

"K-Katie, stop!"

They fell on the ground with Marcus on top of her. He tickled her and they were both laughing. Katie rolled around trying to get away.

"M-Marcus, I think we should stop!"

"No way! This is too much fun and I'm getting back at you!"

"Mr. Flint!"

The two stopped. Oh shit...

Marcus turned around and saw professors McGonagall and Snape. "Uhhh... Hi..."

"Mr. Flint, please come with us."

Yup, I'm screwed, he thought...

* * *

><p>24. Change Harry's ringtone to "Never Say Never" by Justin Bieber.<p>

I'll never say never!

"What the fuck, Harry?" Ron asked increduously.

Harry took out his cellphone. "GINNY!"

* * *

><p>25. Lock Angelina and Montague in Dumbledore's office just to see what would happen.<p>

"What are you doing?" Montague asked her after twenty minutes of sitting around.

"Talking to the Sorting Hat."

"What does it say?"

"Its a boy hat."

"Okay... What does he say?"

"He says you have a small dick, and that's why you're in Slytherin..."

* * *

><p>26. Hurt the sorting hat's feelings.<p>

"Oh my gosh, Graham! What did you say?"

Montague smirked and sat back down...

* * *

><p>27. Ask Marcus if he likes Katie Bell.<p>

PUNCH!

28. Nor will I ask him if he likes 14-year-old girls.

PUNCH!

29. Or make fun of his teeth.

PUNCH!

* * *

><p>30. Punch Cassius Warrington<p>

**AN: Pointless Randomness lol :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: Don't own HP**

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 31-40

31. Bring my pet snake to Harry.

"Here." Hermione placed a small baby king snake on Harry's desk.

"What do you want me to do with it?"

"Talk to it."

Harry grinned and shook his head. "Thats funny."

"What did he say?"

"He says you have nice boobs..."

* * *

><p>32. Play the Gummi Bear Song in Snape's class.<p>

Oh, I'm a Yummy, Chummy, Funny, Lucky Gummy Bear.

I'm a Jelly bear, Cuz I'm a Gummy bear,

Oh I'm a movin', groovin', Jammin', Singin' Gummy Bear

Oh Yeah!

"Weasleys! Detention!"

* * *

><p>33. Nor will we hook up a speaker in the girl's dorm to play Barbie Girl at five in the morning.<p>

"FRED!"

"GEORGE!"

* * *

><p>34. Talk about my personal life with Marcus while he's taking a shower.<p>

"Hey, Marcus."

"What the fuck? Katie, what are you doing here?" Marcus asked trying to cover himself with his hands.

"I need to talk to you."

"Can we talk later? I'm naked and busy at the moment."

Katie shrugged. "I don't mind."

The fuck?

"So, can I stay?"

Marcus sighed. "Fine."

* * *

><p>35. Not make Star Wars sounds while dueling.<p>

"Swish! Woosh! Woosh! Swish!"

"What are you doing, Potter?"

"EXPERRIARMUS!" **(AN: Too excited for spelling)**

* * *

><p>36. Hug Katie when your wet and naked, with a towel wrapped around your waist.<p>

"Katie, don't cry."

Marcus sighed and wrapped a towel his waist. He walked over and pulled her small body against his chest. She stopped crying but continued to shake a little. He brushed her hair.

"Better?"

Katie nodded into his chest. Marcus heard a soft cough. The two looked at the door. In the doorway were Oliver, Angelina, Alicia, Fred, and George, a long with, Warrington, Montague, and Miles.

"Uhhh... It's so what it looks like," Marcus said as Katie cuddled more into his chest. It was then Marcus realized... THIS WAS A SETUP! Damn, she's a clever little girl...

* * *

><p>37. Give Professor Lupin squeakychew toys.

"Haha, very funny Harry, Ron, Hermione."

* * *

><p>38. Laugh at Voldemort<p>

"Harry Potter, you and your friends will be destroyed!"

Harry and DA tried to hide their giggles.

"I'll rip out your-"

"Hahahahahaha!"

"What! What is so funny?" Voldemort asked.

"You don't have a nose," Harry said and DA fell to the ground laughing.

"Its true, though," Bellatrix said. **(AN: Too excited to check spelling)**

"SHUT UP!"

* * *

><p>39. Meet Edward Cullen.<p>

"Umm... Hello, I'm Harry Potter, the boy who lived, and these are my friends, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Draco."

"Hello, Harry, I'm Edward Cullen, the boy who'll live forever."

"Uh-huh..."

"Back away real slowly," Hermione whispered. "This guy is nuts."

Then they turned around and ran.

"Great going, Potter," Malfoy said angrily. "We were suppose to meet Percy Jackson, not a stupid, sparkling vampire who's gayer then holy fuck!"

* * *

><p>40. Experiment with another girl.<p>

"Hey, Angelina, you know... Uhhh..."

"Yes, Alicia?" Angelina asked looking up from her homework.

Alicia sat beside her. "Uhhh... Remember when Ron asked us if we ever had a girl-on-girl-on-girl threesome together."

Angelina closed her book. "Yes."

"Well... I was wondering if, you know... Kissed a girl?"

"No... I haven't... Have-"

"What? No. I never kissed a girl..."

"Would you like-"

"Yes!"

"Okay."

Angelina and Alicia leaned in until their lips finally touched. Angelina opened her mouth and Alicia slid her tongue in. Angelina kissed back, and they ended up making out...

"OH MY GOSH! YOU'RE BOTH GAY! I KNEW IT!"

The two girls pulled apart and stared at Katie who was standing in the doorway.

"Katie, we can explain-"

Before they could say anything else, Katie ranaway laughing and yelling for Montague and Warrington...

**AN: Ok. Review this because I like this chapter :)**


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: This chapter is off the wall. Sooo beware**

**Disclaimer: Don't own HP**

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 41-50

41. GO ON A MUGGLE STUDIES ROAD TRIP AND MEET JUSTIN BIEBER!

"Uhhh... Hi, I'm Harry Potter and these are my friends Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Draco. We're on a road trip."

"Hi! I'm Justin Bieber!"

"OH MY GOSH!" Ginny cried happily.

"Ohhh myyy goooosssshhhh!" Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Draco said rolling their eyes.

"*cough*avada kedavra*cough*" Malfoy "coughed" softly with his wand out from under his sleeve.

Justin Bieber fell back... Dead.

"JUSTIN!"

"Sad," said Ron.

"So tragic," Hermione said. "America will miss his..."

"Thanks," Harry whispered to Malfoy.

"No problem."

"Oh my gosh something is coming out of his stomach!"

* * *

><p>42. Or Rebecca Black.<p>

"AHHHHHH! REBECCA BLACK!"

"Hi guys! Do you know what day it is?"

"Ahh, kill her! Kill her!"

"Avada Kedavra!" Hermione yelled.

"Good. She's dead."

"Hey, guys I'm back!" Justin Bieber cameback.

"AHHHH!"

"Thats it! We're going back to Hogwarts!"

* * *

><p>43. Ask Miles if it's his "time" when he's having a bad day.<p>

Adrian grinned. "Hey, Miles, you seem to be having a bad day. Is it your time of the month?"

"WHAT PART OF, ITS A CASTING ERROR, DON'T ALL OF YOU GET?"

* * *

><p>44. Tell everyone Angelina and Alicia kissed.<p>

Katie stood up on the Gryffindor Table in the Great Hall and yelled...

"ANGELINA AND ALICIA KISSED!"

Everyone went silent and stared at the two girls. Montague and Warrington grinned and winked at each other...

* * *

><p>45. Tell everyone Katie is in love with Marcus Flint. <strong>(AN: This is a serious one)<strong>

"Katie, open up," Alicia begged knocking on her door.

"Please we just want to talk," Angelina said.

"We're sorry. We didn't know it was true!"

The door opened, and Katie came out. "You didn't think I was in love with him?"

"Well, you always torture him."

"How else am I suppose to get his attension?" Katie sighed. "What does it matter anyway? He's eighteen. He'll never love me..."

* * *

><p>46. Ask Angelina and Alicia to make a girl-on-girl video. <strong>(AN: Humor in this one)<strong>

SLAP!

KICK!

"Sooo, we'll take that as a no?" Warrington said to Montague.

Montague nodded still on the floor...

* * *

><p>47. Make fun of Katie to Marcus. <strong>(AN: This one will make you say awww)<strong>

"Hey, Marcus! Where's your fourteen-year-old slut?" Derrick yelled from across the Slytherin Common Room.

Marcus grabbed him and slammed him against the wall. "Don't you EVER call Katie Bell a slut!" Marcus dropped him and turned to everyone in the room. "That goes for everyone! No one will lay a hand on Katie Bell or else I'll cut off your discostick, and that's a promise!" Marcus walked out of the common room.

"When he said discostick, did he mean our-"

"YES!" The girls yelled.

* * *

><p>48. Ask Miles if he knows what a discostick is.<p>

"Hey, Miles, do you know what a discostick is?" Malfoy asked

Miles sighed. "Yes. Why?"

"Do you have one?"

"YES! I'M A GUY! WHOEVER DIRECTED THE FIRST MOVIE MADE A CASTING ERROR!"

* * *

><p>49. Call Madam Hooch a Hoochie Mama.<p>

"Self-explanatory," said George.

"Then why did you make me do it?" Fred asked.

"Someone had to get burned in this one."

* * *

><p>50. Invite Edward Cullen to the final battle. <strong>(AN: This one is crazy)<strong>

"Harry Potter, you will-"

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!

"Who can be knocking at this hour?" Voldemort asked angrily.

"Chill, Voldy," Harry said. "People are still arriving, they're late... Can someone get the door?"

"I'll get it," McGonagall said.

"While she's doing that," Voldemort started. "Is everyone here? All death eaters...?"

"Here!"

"Dumbledore's Army?"

"All here!" Hermione said.

"Then who are we missing?" Voldemort asked.

All of sudden McGonagall shrieked, and there was a bright surrounding a person as they walked in. Everyone's eyes widen as Edward Cullen walked to the middle of the room.

"Hai guise... I'm back..."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"SHIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTT!"

"DIE YOU FAIRY MOTHERFUCKER!" Voldemort yelled raising his wand and shout the killing curse.

"WHAT THE FUCK! IT DIDN'T WORK!"

"RUUUUUUNNNNN!"

When everyone cleared the room, Harry asked. "WHO WAS THE DUMBASS WHO INVITED EDWARD FUCKIN' CULLEN!"

**AN: See. Crazy, right? Yeahhh... Things will get better for Katie and Marcus in a funny sort of way. And I have nothing against twilight. For #50 I saw a picture that made funny pic of Edward Cullen, so this happened. And I'm going to come out and say I DON'T LIKE JUSTIN BIEBER. I am going to make fun of him as much as I can. Whoever said, invite Justin Bieber to Hogwarts, trust me I'll do that (next story I'll try to put in, if not keep reading, you'll see it) And Rebecca Black... I saw a funny pic of her with big bird. :)**

**Uhhh... Yeah so review, and give me ideas. Anything will do. If you want me to make fun of a character, movie star, or singer, write it in a review. :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: Don't own HP**

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 51-60

51. Drop Crookshanks from a window to see if he can land on his feet.

"Harry, maybe we should go to the quidditch field," said Ron as Harry walked to the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Why?"

"RON!"

Ron placed a hand on Harry's shoulder. "Seeing as I'm about to die, mate, you have permission to marry my sister..." Ron took off running...

* * *

><p>52. Invite Justin Bieber to a dinner party at Hogwarts.<p>

"Damnit, can we get started with this Peace Dinner?" Voldemort asked from his table.

"Voldy, chill!" Harry yelled. "We can start now." He looked at Dumbledore.

Dumbledore nodded and stood up. "Well, one and all to our Peace Dinner at Hogwarts. We can now-"

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!

"All right, who's the bitch that's late?"

"I'll get it," Hermione said.

"While she's doing that, let's be thankful for-"

"AHHHHH! JUSTIN BIEBER!"

Everyone in the Great Hall started freaking out.

"KILL HIM! KILL HIM!" Voldemort cried.

"NO!" Harry yelled. "YOU'LL JUST MAKE IT WORSE!"

Dumbledore yelled the killing curse.

"Too late," Malfoy moaned miserably.

Rebecca Black appeared in place of Justin Bieber.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Hey everyone do you know what day it is?"

"Ummm... Friday?" Adrian said nervously.

"YOU IDIOT!" Marcus yelled smacking him behind the head.

"Thats right it's Friday, Friday, getting down on Friday..."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"RUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNN!"

When they were out of the great hall, Dumbledore asked, "Who was the bitch that invited Justin Bieber, and who gave him the potion that turns people into talentless white girls who can't sing?"

* * *

><p>53. Put Monster Books in the shower with Angelina and Alicia.<p>

"Do you think Katie will ever forgive us?" Alicia asked taking off her clothes in the locker room.

"Yeah. She doesn't hold grudges," Angelina said as they walked to the showers.

Katie Bell grinned as she walked into the Gryffindor Locker Room and to the shower, with a large sack. She stood at the door and dumped out the Monster Books, that looked up at Katie. Katie pointed to the two girls who were in the showers. The Monster Books growled and barked then charged...

Angelina and Alicia looked at the pack of Monster Books.

"AHHHH!"

Still wet, they grabbed their towels and wrapped them around their bodies before running out've the showers and locker room. Both were too busy to notice Katie calling off the Monster Books.

"Do you think we lost them?" Alicia asked as they neared the school.

"Yeah, I think-"

"Hello you two..."

Shit the girls turned around and saw Montague and Warrington.

"Hmmm... You two seem to be lacking something," Montague said with a smirk.

"Perhaps we can help you," Warrington said with the same smirk.

Angelina and Alicia shared the same nervous glance...

* * *

><p>54. Nor will I make a deal with Slytherins.<p>

"Angelina and Alicia aren't going anywhere with you two..." Katie said walking up to the group.

"Thanks, Katie," Angelina said relieved.

"On one condition..."

"KATIE!"

"What do you want?" Montague asked.

"Marcus Flint. Let me talk to Marcus."

Montague and Warrington looked at each other.

"Do we have a deal?" Katie asked.

"Whats going on?" Marcus asked walking towards the group.

"Deal!" Warrington said pushing Marcus towards Katie, and scooping up Alicia then walking away.

Montague grinned and started walking away, dragging Angelina behind him.

Katie smiled and hugged Marcus.

"Katie, what is going on?" Marcus asked slowly...

* * *

><p>55. Mispronounce Cool Whip to annoy Hermione.<p>

"Good morning, Hermione."

"Good morning, Harry."

"Hey, Hermione pass me some cool hip."

What?"

"I said pass me some cool hip."

"You're saying it wrong. Why are you putting so much emphasis on the 'h'?"

"I'm just saying cool hip."

"No, Harry. Say cool."

"Cool."

"Now say whip."

"Whip."

"Good now put it together."

"Cool hip."

"ARGH!"

* * *

><p>56. Scare Alicia.<p>

"Hey, Alicia, want to play a game of rape?"

"Not really, no."

"That's the spirit..."

Alicia nervously backed away from Warrington...

* * *

><p>56. Teach Ginny sex and math at the same time.<p>

"You see, Ginny, sex is like math... You add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray you don't multiply."

"Okayyyy..."

* * *

><p>57. Offend Angelina.<p>

"Hey Angelina."

"Hi, Montague."

"Angelina, do you know why opinions are like orgasms?"

"No."

"I don't care if you have one."

SLAP!

* * *

><p>58. Videotape Voldemort singing in the Hogwart's showers.<p>

"Shhhh!" Harry whispered to Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Draco. "He's starting to sing."

"Ra ra ra-ah-ah. Ro ma, Ro ma-ah Gaga oolah. Want your bad romance."

"HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Voldemort turned around and saw the camera. "DAMNIT, POTTER!"

* * *

><p>59. Get drunk and fly Mr. Weasley's flying car through McGonagall's office.<p>

McGonagall was grading test papers when...

"YEEEEEEHHHHHAAAAWWWW!"

CRASH!

"Harry, Harry," Hermione said getting out of the car. "I-I think w-we're not at Ron's house..."

"Y-Yeah, mate," Ron said stumbling out of the car. "And-And you're to drunk to drive!"

"I am not drunk!" Harry yelled and fell out of the car.

"Harry, we need to get home," Ginny said leaning against Hermione. "We're going to miss our wedding."

Draco fell out of the car. "Its Saturday! Potter you're getting married in two hours!"

"Maybe it wasn't a good idea to get drunk three hours before my wedding-"

"OH MY GOSH!" Hermione cried. "ITS PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL!"

"Proffesor!" Harry said happily. "Its freakin great to see you!"

"You should come to Harry and Ginny's wedding!" Ron said then burped.

"What is going on in here?" Dumbledore walked in.

"Some of our old students are drunk and well crashed their car through my office," McGonagall said.

"Thats what's up!" Draco said.

Harry, Hermione, Ron, and Ginny laughed.

* * *

><p>60. Pass out in McGonagall's office.<p>

"All right... Your families have been informed and... Oh..." McGonagall looked at her watch. "Looks like Potter missed his wedding

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Haha Harry and Ginny missed their wedding, and Katie is back to well... Being Katie and doing whatever it is Katies do lol :)<strong>


	7. AN Please Read

New Story:

Please check out my new story, "Marcus." It's a serious story. Highlights my favorite couple Marcus and Katie. It took three weeks and is 21 pages long :)


	8. Chapter 8

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 61-70

61. Not Not Kiss Katie Bell.

"So as you know Marcus, I'm in love with you... So do you love me?"

"I can name a thousand reasons why I shouldn't."

"Shouldn't? That means you should, which means you do!"

"What?"

Before he could do anything Katie grabbed him and started kissing him. Marcus shrugged and pulled her closer. At least it's not a fifty-year-old man.

"MR. FLINT!" Yeah, it was McGonagall.

Marcus pulled away and said, "I'M EIGHTEEN! NOT FIFTY!" Then went back to kissing her.

* * *

><p>62. Ask Katie about her new choice in pets.<p>

Katie sat in her room petting her Monster Books and giving them names, while they purred happily. Angelina and Alicia walked in.

"Angelina, Alicia!"

"Katie, we need to talk..."

"About what?"

The Monster Books started to growl.

"About your choice in pets..."

* * *

><p>63. Give Katie advice on how to make jackalopes.<p>

"Hey, Hermione, can you show me how to make jackalopes?"

"Sure!"

* * *

><p>64. Nor will I show her how to make jackalopes fly.<p>

"Hey, Marcus, isn't that your girlfriend?" Adrian asked.

"Yeah..." Marcus said looking down from his broom, at the blond girl with two large sacks. He watched as she dumped out the Monster Books, and then...

"Hey are those rabbits with antlers?" Warrington asked.

Before Marcus could respond, the Monster Books and Attack Bunnies were chasing the Slytherin Team around Hogwarts. Marcus landed next to Katie, who threw her arms around him.

"Katie, we need to talk..."

"About what?"

"Your choice in... Pets..."

* * *

><p>65. Watch McGonagall undress.<p>

Hermione rolled her eyes at her guy friends, and boyfriend. Standing next to her were, Ginny, Angelina, Alicia, and Katie

"So, why are we here watching these... Men throw up like drunk girls at parties?" Alicia asked finally.

Hermione sighed. "Ron, explain why your all throwing up like drunk girls at parties."

Ron gulped. "We saw... We saw McGonagall naked!"

"Thats it?" Alicia asked.

"You weren't there!" Harry cried.

"It was horrible!" Fred added tearfully.

The girls rolled their eyes and walked away, mumbling, "Babies..."

* * *

><p>66. Watch McGonagall undress to prove to the guys they're a bunch of babies.<p>

Hermione, Ginny, Angelina, Alicia, and Katie were in seperate stalls in Moaning Myrtle's Bathroom, kneeling in front of toilets spilling out their breakfast.

"That must've been an awesome party," Harry said to Ron and Draco.

* * *

><p>67. Compare the girls to drunk party girls.<p>

SELF-EXPLANATORY

* * *

><p>68. Make Katie runaway.<p>

"Hey, Katie."

"Hi, Marcus!"

"Katie, do you what I call girls that can run faster than me?"

"What?"

"Virgins― What! Katie, comeback! I didn't mean it like that!"

* * *

><p>69. Freak out Hermione.<p>

"Hey, Hermione."

"Hi, Harry."

"Hermione, remember when you cried on my leg during Half Blood Prince?"

"Um yes. Why?"

"I came."

(Hermione's facial expression was this O.O)

* * *

><p>70. Show "Twilight" in Snape's class.<p>

"No, Diggory. Vampires don't sparkle. Fifty points from Hufflepuff."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: OK. So yeah. Sorry about all the Marcus and Katie. So far thats whats been coming to mind lately... Umm yeah, some of these, I guess you can call them, scenes I get from pictures. I mean you go on google or bing and just type in "<span>Funny Harry Potter Pics"<span> and stuff will come up. And yeah then I have my original humor with jackalopes, and other random stuff. :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: Don't own HP**

**AN: Ok, I'm going to explain some of these :)**

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 71-80

71. I will not turn all the Gryffindors into jackalopes. **(AN: Bunnies with antlers)**

"Miss. Bell, I appreciate what you did with your transfiguration project, but can you please turn your friends back to teenagers?"

Katie sighed. "Yes, Professor McGonagall..."

* * *

><p>72. Nor will I do it to Slyterins.<p>

"Ms. Bell, I applaud you on your... Jackalope potion, but turn the Slytherins back to human... Right now..."

"Yes, sir..."

* * *

><p>73. Invite Percy Jackson to a Hogwarts.<p>

"Hi, I'm Percy Jackson."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Ginny, calm down," Ron said to his sister.

"That wasn't me, that was Harry."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! IT'S PERCY JACKSON!"

* * *

><p>74. Steal Alicia's sandwich.<p>

"Whats going on?" Harry asked when he saw everyone at the entance of the common room.

Ron pointed...

"DON'T EVER TAKE MY SANDWICH!" SPANK! SPANK! SPANK!

George was leaning over the couch getting spanked Alicia Spinnet.

Fred sighed. "I don't know whether I should cry or laugh."

"Laugh till you cry, Fred..."

* * *

><p>75. Sneak into Montague's room and steal his underwear and display it in Gryffindor Common Room.<p>

"Wow," Hermione said.

"I don't believe it," Ginny said shaking her head amused.

"I don't believe it either," Angelina added blushing.

"Damn, Angelina, and you're going to marry this man," joked Alicia.

Katie grinned. You never would've thought... Graham Montague has Lady Gaga Boxers..."

* * *

><p>76. Make Cassius Warrington cry.<p>

Alicia shook her head grinning.

"Why is he crying?" Malfoy asked.

"I told him I was pregnant."

"Are you?"

"No"

Malfoy shook his head. "Telling a man that you're pregnant would make any man cry."

"Actually, that's not why he's crying..."

"Then..."

"I told him I was pregnant with twins..."

"Oh..."

"Twin girls."

Warrington cried harder...

* * *

><p>77. Makeout with Ginny.<p>

"HARRY!"

"BRO, THATS A FUCKIN CHAINSAW!" Harry cried.

"RON!" Hermione yelled. "RETURN THE DAMN CHAINSAW!"

"Hermione!"

"BITCH, RETURN THE CHAINSAW BEFORE I CUT OFF YOUR DISCOSTICK!"

Ron sighed and turned off the chainsaw. "Fine."

* * *

><p>78. Ask Madam Pomfrey if she has "enhancement pills." <strong>(AN: You should know what those are)<strong>

"OUT! GET OUT!"

* * *

><p>79. Nor will I ask Dumbledore.<p>

"Yes, yes, of course! Which would you like, Viagra or Extenze?"

(The guys facial experessions were like this O.o)

* * *

><p>80. Ask Marcus if he wants to see my pussy. <strong>(AN: Lol ;) This one took me awhile)<strong>

Marcus was sitting with Montague, Warrington, Adrian, and Miles in the courtyard. He smiled when he saw Katie come over. She hopped on his lap and cuddled.

"Marcus, can I ask you something?" Katie asked.

"Yeah, what is it?"

"Do you want to see my pussy?"

Marcus's eyes widen, while his friends tried to hide their laughter.

"Not... Now..." He said nervously.

"But, you said you wanted to see her."

"Her?" Montague repeated.

"Yeah," Katie said turning to him. "My pussy is a girl."

Marcus's friends tried to hide their blushes and laughter, but none were succeeding.

"Please, Marcus, she's really soft and nice, and she likes to be petted."

"Can I pet her afterwards?" Warrington asked.

Katie smiled. "Of course! All of you can! She would love it!"

"I bet she would," Miles said.

Marcus glared at them then turned his attension back to Katie. "Maybe later, Katie."

Katie shrugged. "I'll show you now..." She started digging through her robes

"Katie, you really-"

"Marcus, this is my stuff pussycat that I got from Hogsmede."

Marcus smiled and let out a sigh of relief when he saw the stuffed animals. His friends, were too busy laughing.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Hmmm... I wonder what everyone was thinking when they read #80 ;). Anyway sorry about the KatieMarcus, I couldn't think of the right couple to do it with.**

**Ok, some of you might realize that I like using the quidditch girls (Angelina, Alicia, and Katie) along with Slytherin Ouidditch team (Marcus, Warrington, Montague, Adrian, Miles). Why? They have the least character development and its fun to make them OOC. For desciption on their appearance, refer back to the first and second movie :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: Don't own HP**

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 81-90

81. Do a TWSS joke on Madam Hooch.

"Hey, Madam Hooch, my brother hit his head pretty hard and he can't remember how to fly his broom. Can you show him?"

"Of course... Now Fred, once you've got a hold of your broom, I want you to mount it. Grip it tight. You don't want to be sliding off the end."

"Thats what she said!" Fred laughed...

"Hey, Cassius, look!" Alicia pointed out the window at some large flames. "What is that?"

Warrington shrugged. "An explosion..."

* * *

><p>82. Talk about how I made Voldemort cry.<p>

Harry laughed. "So he was like 'you will lose everything' so I was like yeah, everything but my nose... And then he cried!"

Ron and Hermione started laughing.

"Epic win, Harry!" Hermione said.

"And that's how I defeated Voldemort."

* * *

><p>83. Call Voldemort Moldybutt.<p>

"No you do it," Draco said to Bellatrix.

"I can't, I'll start laughing."

"Fine." Malfoy grinned as Voldemort walked by. "Hey, Moldybutt!"

Bellatrix and Malfoy burst into laughter.

* * *

><p>84. Ask what Cedric Diggory is doing now these days.<p>

Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Cho **(AN: Cho. I know right lol) **walked into Professor Trelawney's classroom. Harry walked up to her.

"Professor, can you tell us what Cedric Diggory is doing now these day?"

"Of course, of course." She looked into the crystal ball. Her eyes widen. "OH, dear boy, the horror!"

"What?" Cho asked. "What did you see?"

"Nothing," Professor Trelaway said throwing the crystal ball out the window. "Nothing, my dear girl."

* * *

><p>85. Embarass Cassius Warrington infront of his friends.<p>

Alicia saw Warrington sitting in the courtyard with Marcus, Montague, Miles, and Adrian. She walked over. Warrington smiled.

"Hi, Alicia, you need something?"

Alicia sighed and hugged him. "We need to talk."

"Umm... Okay, let's go."

"No, let's talk here." She let him go. "I think it's a good idea if your friends hear this too, that way they'll be more understanding."

"Understanding to what?" Warrington asked.

"Cassius, you're a great guy, and I'll always love you. You don't have worry about it."

"Worry about what?"

"It's okay to admit it, Cassius. Size doesn't matter. I understand, I'm sure your friends understand."

Warrington looked over at his friends who were now hiding their giggles. What's with them? He wondered.

"Its perfectly fine, baby," Alicia said gently, hugging him. "If it really bothers you, there are charms for it, and you can always get enhancement pills from Dumbledore."

Warrington's friends burst out laughing. Warrington, finally realizing what she meant, pushed her away, and started struggling to take off his pants.

"I am well endowed!" He pulled down his boxers. "See!"

Alicia blushed and winked. She grabbed Warrington's hand and started leading him away. "Lets go, then."

* * *

><p>86. Watch "Terms of Endearment."<strong> (AN: Anyone watch "Victorious?" Because this will sound firmiliar)<strong>

"So what are we watching tonight?" Angelina asked Montague when she sat down next to him in the empty Slytherin Common Room.

"'Terms of Endearment,'" Montague said.

The movie started. Angelina sighed contentedly. She had to admit, it was pretty nice in the empty common room and...

"Hey, you two! What's up?"

Angelina nearly jumped when she saw Adrian Puecy and Miles Bletchley.

"What are you two doing here?" Montague asked.

"We were bored." Miles and Adrian sat down next to them on the couch. "What are we watching?"

"'Terms of Endearment.'"

"Cool, that movie is hiliarious," Miles said.

"Its not a comedy," Montague said and continued to watch the movie with his girlfriend and two friends.

After a few minutes, Miles and Adrian started laughing.

"Hey, what's so funny?"

Angelina and Montague turned around and saw Katie, Marcus, Alicia, and Warrington.

"What are all of you doing here?" Angelina asked.

"Our date is over," Marcus said.

"And Adrian texted that, you were watching a funny movie," Warrington added.

"How is it funny?" Montague asked to no one in particular.

"We're watching 'Terms of Endearment,'" Miles said. "Come watch. You didn't miss much."

Katie, Marcus, Alicia, and Warrington sat down on the couch.

"Hey, is that Debra Winger?" Katie asked.

"Yeah, she's hiliarious," Adrian said.

"Shes dying!" Angelina said in shock.

The movie continued playing. 'I'm going to miss being alive,' the actress said weakly.

Katie, Alicia, Marcus, Warrington, Miles, and Adrian burst into laughter. Montague and Angelina stood up and walked to the stairs leading to the boys dorms.

"How is that funny?" Montague asked before following Angelina up the stairs.

"Does she ever quit crying?" Adrian asked still laughing at the movie.

"Ohhh, she'll be dead in minutes," Katie said laughing a long with her friends and boyfriend.

* * *

><p>87. Question Cho about her ex. <strong>(AN: Again. I know right? lol)<strong>

"So, Cho, what is Cedric doing now these days?"

Cho sighed. "I don't want to talk about it, Katie."

"I heard he was a vampire."

"No... He's not a vampire..."

"Then what is he?"

"I don't want to talk about it, Katie."

"Come on, Cho, it can't be that bad."

"HES A SPARKLING BITCH FAIRY!"

* * *

><p>88. Remind everyone Voldemort doesn't have a nose.<p>

"We will win this war!" Harry said to DA. "Because we have one thing Voldemort doesn't have..."

"A personality?" George asked.

"No."

"A dick?" Fred asked.

"True. But no."

"A girlfriend!"

DA laughed.

"NO! We will win this because the one thing he doesn't have is... A nose!"

Everyone started laughing again.

* * *

><p>89. Hit on Miles Bletchley.<p>

Miles was sitting on the couch reading a book. Adrian walked over and sat down, sliding an arm over his shoulders.

"Uhhh... What are you doing, Puecy?"

"Well, I saw you, and well... You know... You were looking kinda hot in... You know..."

"Uhhh... What?"

"Yeah, maybe we can hangout sometime. Go for a ride on my broomstick."

Miles shoved him away. "I'M NOT A GIRL! IT WAS A CASTING ERROR! THE CASTING DIRECTOR IS AN IDIOT!"

* * *

><p>90. I will not even THINK about reading Twilight.<p>

Hermione walked into the Great Hall and sat down across from Harry and Ron.

"I was thinking of reading Twilight," she said.

Everyone who heard her looked at her.

"No!" Colin yelled.

"Nooo!" Parvati added.

"No way!" Alicia said horrified.

"Oh, Merlin, no," said Fred and George.

"You cannot do that," said Ron. "That is social suicide."

"Damn, you are so lucky you have us to guide you," said Harry.

"Ms. Granger, I heard you were thinking about reading Twilight," Snape said appearing out of nowhere. "Fifty points from Gryffindor."

**AN: Thank you all for the nice reviews :). As you can see I'm almost to 100, but I'm not going to end it there. I honestly don't know where I should end it at because I have a lot of fun writing this and new idea pop into my head please review and I'm open to new ideas or suggestions :)**

**Lol I'm not really a big Cho Chang fan, but whatever... Lol. #89 I'm going to do something to Miles ;)**


	11. Chapter 11

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 91-100

**Disclaimer: Don't own HP**

**AN: This is a messed up chapter lol. So beware**

91. Know the truth about Miles Bletchley.

Marcus, Montague, and Warrington were sitting in the courtyard chatting happily with their Gryffindor girlfriends, Katie, Angelina, and Alicia. They saw Miles coming their way. Montague coughed.

"Speaking of hot girls," Montague said loudly, "Theres one now."

Marcus, Warrington, Katie, Angelina, and Alicia laughed. Miles glared angrily at them.

"ALL RIGHT! THATS IT!" Miles yelled, strangley his voice seemed to get higher. "FINE! YOU WIN!" He started taking off his clothes. "FUCK THIS DISGUISE!" Pretty soon all his clothes were on ground.

Marcus, Montague, and Warrington were staring in disbelief. Katie, Angelina, and Alicia's mouths dropped. Standing infront of them was a girl in a green bra and green bikini underwear. They couldn't believe it...

Miles Bletchley was... A GIRL! **(AN: Ohhhh! What's up! Bet you didn't see that coming... Well neither did I :P)**

"OH MY GOSH!" Katie cried.

"You really are a girl?" Warrington said in disbelief.

"Yes, I'm a girl." Miles rolled her eyes.

"Well, what do we call you?" Marcus asked.

She shrugged. "Miles. It's a girls name too."

"Why were you disguising yourself as a boy?" Montague asked.

"Because I wanted to prove I could do it. Being a cunning Slytherin, I pulled it off."

"WAIT!" Angelina said loudly. "SO WHEN I THOUGHT I WAS KISSING A GUY IN THE LOCKER ROOM LAST YEAR, I WAS REALLY KISSING A- OH MY GOSH!"

"Thats right," Miles smirked. "You kissed a girl."

"Are you gay by any chance?" Alicia asked.

"No."

"PROVE IT!" Katie yelled.

Before Miles could answer, Adrian Puecy started coming towards them. He grinned at the half-naked girl.

"Whos the- mmpf!"

His mouth was engulfed in a soft wet mouth, with the girl's tongue fighting with his. He kissed her back and pulled her closer to him.

Marcus's eyes widen. "If this wasn't wierd, this would be really hot."

Everyone nodded. Miles pulled away blushing. Adrian, clearly shaken, almost fell down.

"Whos the hot girl?" Adrian asked.

"Miles," said Marcus.

"Bletchley," Katie finished.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Adrian shrieked and passed out.

"Hes really... Shocked," Alicia said.

"Hes cute," Miles admitted.

The girls giggled, and the guys rolled their eyes.

"He'll wake up soon," said Montague shaking his head.

"Am I still on the quidditch team?" Miles asked.

Everyone looked at Marcus.

Marcus sighed. "I'll let it slide, simply because you're a good keeper."

"Thank you, Marcus."

All of a sudden, Adrian woke up. He stared at Miles. "You're a girl..."

Miles grinned. "And your my boyfriend!"

"Uhhh... What?"

"Come on, we're going back to your room." She started dragging him away.

"Now we know who's going to wear the pants in that relationship," Warrington said with a smirk.

"Technically, she's been wearing the pants," Katie said, and everyone laughed and nodded.

* * *

><p>92. Walk in on Alicia and Warrington. <strong>(AN: Ever seen the movie "Little Man?")<strong>

Alicia and Warrington were getting it on in the locker room when...

"Alicia, have you seen my... WOAH!"

"AHHHHHH!"

"Katie, what are you doing in-"

"There you are, Katie," Marcus said walking in. "I been looking for you all ov- WOAH!"

"Katie, Marcus, what are you... WOAH!" Angelina's eyes widen.

"Hey!" Montague said walking in. "What is every- WOAH!"

"Hey everyone," said Adrian, "What is everyone doing in... WOAH!"

"Hi everyone," said Miles. "What are we all... WOAH! THAT'S THE BIGGEST CHOCOLATE BAR I EVER SEEN!" She pointed to the candy bar in the cornor. **(AN: Miles is still a chic lol)**

Everyone blushed.

"Yes," said Montague, "That is a big candy bar, but that's not what we were refering to..."

* * *

><p>93. Give Marcus Flint sex advice while he's trying to have sex with Katie.<p>

"Hmm... It seems I have a scared, naked Gryffindor in my dungeon... Hmm, what can I do to punish her? Ahhh, I know..." Marcus grinned and bent down to nibble on Katie's neck.

Katie giggled. "Marcus, I love you so-"

"Yeahhh! Go, Marcus!"

"Eep!" Katie pulled a blanket over her naked body.

Marcus turned around and glared at Montague, Warrington, and Adrian. "WHAT THE FUCK!"

"We're here to give you pointers," Warrington said.

"You need to do with a little more with the roleplaying," Montague said. "Keep Katie interested and relaxed."

Marcus growled. "I know what I'm doing, now SHUT UP! AND LET ME MAKE HOT, PASSIONATE LOVE TO MY GIRLFRIEND!" Marcus leaned in and started to kiss and bite her neck.

"Foreplay will keep her relaxed," Adrian suggested.

"I SAID SHUT UP!"

Marcus pulled down his boxers. He didn't care if his friends saw him naked. Let the younger men be jealous. **(AN: Okay, I got that quote from another fanfic. Sorry, when I read it, I started laughing)**

"Marcus, make sure you take it slow," Montague said. "Katie is a virgin after all."

"SHUT UP! I KNOW!"

"Deep breaths, Katie," Warrington said. "It'll sting for a little bit and then it'll feel amazing."

"Warrington," Marcus warned...

Marcus started making love to Katie...

"WHOOOO! TAKE IT, MARCUS! YEAH, THATS RIGHT!"

When Marcus and Katie finished, Katie fell asleep, and Marcus glared at his friends.

"I don't need a cheering squad when I'm having sex with my girlfriend, and I don't need pointers, now... GET THE FUCK OUT!"

Montague, Warrington, and Adrian walked out of Marcus's room grinning...

* * *

><p>94. Let Disney direct Harry Potter.<p>

"All right!" Said the director. "Group picture!"

Harry stood smiling nervously in between Dumbledore, who was next to Voldemort and Bellatrix, and Draco Malfoy, who was also smiling nervously. Hermione and Ron came over too.

"Something about this isn't right," Hermione said. "But I don't know what..."

"Shouldn't we be fighting?" Malfoy asked.

"We're not allowed to," said Harry. "I don't know why though."

"I think I know," said Hermione.

"What?" Ron asked.

"Disney is directing."

"Ohhhhhh!"

"Okay," said Harry. "Does anyone want to go to a bar after this?"

"Its Disney, Harry," Hermione said. "We can't drink."

"FUCK!"

* * *

><p>95. Go into the restricted section of Hogwarts Library.<p>

Katie was walking around Hogwarts Library. She looked up at the large sign that said Restricted and XXX underneath. I wonder why it's restricted. She walked inside and her eyes widen...

Uhhh... Why are there naked women and men posters everywhere? Katie wondered. Ummm... What is that guy doing to that girl? What are those guys doing together? Holy fuck! That's a lot of guys! And... And is that...

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Katie ran screaming out of the library...

Marcus was sitting with his friends, when...

"Hey, Marcus, isn't that your girlfriend?"

"She has a name, Montague."

"MARCUSSSSSSSS!" Katie jumped onto his lap, and buried her face into his chest.

"Hey, Katie. Are you okay?"

"No," she whimpered. "I-I went into the restricted section."

The guys laughed.

"The restricted section isn't for little Katies," Warrington teased.

"No, that's not what freaked me out..."

"Then what is it?"

"ANGELINA AND ALICIA WERE NAKED AND DOING STUFF!"

"Hey, guys, what's up?" It was Angelina and Alicia.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Katie bolted down the hallway.

Marcus rolled his eyes. "I'll get her." He started running after Katie.

Angelina and Alicia turned to Warrington, Montague, and Adrian. "Whats with Katie?"

The guys looked at each other before saying...

"Wellll, you seeeeeee..."

* * *

><p>96. I will not Photoshop Angelina and Alicia's heads onto naked girl posters.<p>

Fred and George were bent over on the couch, getting spanked by Alicia and Angelina. Katie was sitting on Marus's lap, with Montague, Warrington, Adrian, and Miles **(AN: Girl) **sitting in the chairs next to them.

"Sooooooo," Katie said. "It was just Photoshop? It wasn't real?"

"No. Fred and George just photoshopped it," Montague said.

"DON'T EVER DO THAT AGAIN!" Angelina yelled. SPANK! SPANK! SPANK!

"ESTA NALGADA ESTA PRESENTADO POR PEPSI!" Alicia yelled. SPANK! SPANK! SPANK! **(AN: I'll tell you what it means at the end)**

* * *

><p>97. Get revenge for killing Cedric Diggory.<p>

"Damn you, Voldemort. I'll get you for killing Cedric!"

"Ahhh, Potter. Your friend, Mr. Diggory is fairing better in death then he ever did alive..."

Edward Cullen appeared. "Its been awhile, Harry."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Harry took off running, screaming and crying.

* * *

><p>98. Give Katie Tom Riddle's Diary in an attempt to torture Tom Riddle.<p>

Dear Diary,

Today, I had sex with Marcus. It was my first time, and it hurt a little but it was still nice. The only downside is, his friends were cheering him on, which wasn't so bad. I thought it was kinda funny.

-Katie Bell

Okay, first of all, isn't Marcus like eighteen, and you're like 14? WHERE IN WHAT WORLD IS THAT LEGAL! And second, WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME THIS!

-Tom Riddle

Dear Diary,

You're a diary now. Harry gave you to me so I could write in, so shut up and listen to me and give me advice. :)

-Katie Bell

Fine... Tell Marcus to lock his door next time. Good night.

-Tom Riddle

Good night! :)

-Katie Bell

* * *

><p>99. I will not turn Madam Hooch into a jackalope.<p>

Katie nervously walked over to Angelina, Alicia, and Miles, with a jackalope in her hands.

"Hi, Katie," Angelina said happily.

"Hi... Umm... I have a problem." She held up the jackalope. "You seeeee... This is-"

"OH MY GOSH!" Miles shrieked. "MADAM HOOCH?" **(AN: Still a girl)**

"KATIE, WHAT DID YOU DO!" Alicia cried.

"I DIDN'T DO IT! IT WAS FRED AND GEORGE! THEY WERE TRYING TO TURN MARCUS INTO A JACKALOPE, BUT THEY MISSED!"

"Oh my gosh..." Angelina said.

"WHAT DO I DO?"

"The spell will fade off," Miles said reassuringly. "But for now, calm down and find a safe place to put her."

Katie sighed. "I know the perfect place..."

* * *

><p>100. Put Madam Hooch jackalope in Marcus's dorm room.<p>

Marcus, Montague, Warrington, and Adrian were coming back from a long day of quidditch practice...

"Hey, Marcus, what's that on your bed?"

Marcus turned around as he peeled off his shirt. Laying at the foot of his bed was a sleeping jackalope. He shrugged.

"One of Katie's jackalopes. It probably got out." He yawned and turned. "I'll give it back to her tomorrow... Uhhh... Why are you guys looking at me like that?"

"Marcus, look behind you," Montague said.

Marcus turned around. "WHAT THE FUCK!"

Now sitting on his bed was a dazed and confused Madam Hooch. She stood up a little tipsy.

"What happened?" Madam Hooch asked. "And why am I in a Slytherin dorm room surrounded by... Slytherin boys." She pulled out her wand.

"It's not what you think," Warrington said quickly.

"Oh..."

"You were a jackalope a few seconds ago," Adrian added.

"I see." Madam Hooch put her wand away. "Must've been the Weasleys who turned me into a jackalope. I saw Ms. Bell teaching them the spell... Well I'll be on my way." She walked to the door, but not without taking one last glance at Marcus's bare chest. She smirked. "Not bad, Mr. Flint. Not bad at all." With that, she walked out the door.

The guys laughed. Marcus collapsed on his bed. Damn! What a fucked up day it has been, he thought tiredly.

* * *

><p><strong>"ESTA NALGADA ESTA PRESENTADO POR PEPSI!" <strong>

**"This spanking is presented by PEPSI!" Lol random.**

**AN: Yeah, this is probably the most craziest and out there chapter you ever read. Honestly, I didn't even think I would make Miles a girl. Yeah, I said I was going to do something to Miles, but I didn't think it would consist of me turning Miles into a girl. Lol What a twist! Anyway, review this because I'm really proud of this chapter :) And this isn't the end, trust me, there will be more to come :). And thanks for reading and reviewing this crazy, messed up story/list :)**


	12. Chapter 12

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 101-110

**Disclaimer: Don't own HP**

101. Streak around Hogwarts. **(AN: Yay new characters)**

"GO HUFFLEPUFF!" Ernie yelled running naked as the day he was born through the corridors.

Susan shook her and looked at Hannah. "I can't believe you convinced him to run naked around Hogwarts before the game."

Hannah grinned. "I still can't believe he actually did it."

* * *

><p>102. Not pay attention in sex-ed. <strong>(AN: Am I seriously the only one who was sursprised these two didn't end up together?)<strong>

Hannah giggled. "Soooo... Why am I here, Ernie?"

Ernie sighed and pulled off his shirt. "I told you before, Hannah. We're going to have sex, get married and have lots of babies."

"Ummm... Aren't we kinda young to have babies?"

"Right now, yes, but we'll be ready in the future." He pulled off his pants.

"Ernie?"

"Yes, Hannah?"

"What is sex?"

Ernie grinned. "I'll show you..." He pulled off his boxers, and to his horror, Hannah started laughing. "What? What's so funny?"

"It's cute." **(AN: Lol)**

Ernie rolled his eyes. "Take off your clothes, Hannah, and lay down."

She did. Ernie got on top of her, but stopped.

"Aren't you suppose to do something, Ernie?"

"Honestly, I don't know what to do next." **(AN: Lol Innocent Hufflepuffs)**

* * *

><p>103. Call Tonks, Nymphadora.<p>

Tonks was walking around Hogwarts. She smiled when she saw Fred and George.

"Hi, Fred. Hi, George."

"Hello," George said.

"Hello... Nymphadora," Fred said...

"Hey, look!" Katie pointed out the window at some very large flames. "What is that?"

"An even bigger explosion," Cassius said.

"Something muggles call, nukes," Montague suggested.

"An epic barbecue," Miles added. **(AN: Still a girl)**

"That's probably it," Marcus said.

All of a sudden, George walked in followed by Fred who was burned to a crisp.

"Hey, everyone, what were we talking about?" George asked.

"Nuclear barbecue explosions," Katie said.

* * *

><p>104. Go on facebook in Snape's class.<p>

Harry Potter is on fb in Snape's class. :)

Ron Weasley and 20 others like this

Comments

Ron Weasley: Awesome m8 :) So am I!

Draco Malfoy: :)

Hermione Granger: Bad Harry bad.

Ron Weasley: Look who's talking Hermione! You're on it too!

Hermione Granger: Doesn't matter. Snape will kill you if sees you two on facebook.

Ron Weasley: Stop worrying Hermione!

Harry Potter: Don't worry Hermione. Snape can't see us. :)

Serverus Snape: Turn to page three hundred ninety-four...

Likes 21

Hermione Granger: XD Lmao

Draco Malfoy: Lol :P

Ron Weasley: O.O

Harry Potter: O.O

* * *

><p>105. Play the Pedo-Bear song wherever Marcus goes. <strong>(AN: We all know Pedo Bear and the song right? If not go on youtube)<strong>

In the morning...

"I love little girls; they make me feel so good.

I love little girls; they make me feel so bad.

When they're around they make feel like I'm the only guy in town.

I love little girls; they make me feel so good."

Marcus frowned and looked at his phone. Someone changed my ring tone

At breakfast...

"Hey, look, Marcus got a howler!"

Marcus sighed and opened it...

I LOVE LITTLE GIRLS; THEY MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD.

I LOVE LITTLE GIRLS; THEY MAKE ME FEEL SO BAD.

WHEN THEY'RE AROUND THEY MAKE ME FEEL LIKE I'M THE ONLY GUY IN TOWN.

I LOVE LITTLE GIRLS; THEY MAKE ME FEEL SO GOOD!

Marcus slammed his head onto the table while everyone laughed...

In Snape's class...

"I love little girls; they make me feel so good.

I love little girls; they make me feel so bad.

When they're around they make feel like I'm the only guy in town.

I love little girls; they make me feel so good."

"Obviously," Snape said going back to writing on the board.

Marcus groaned.

In McGonagall's class

"I love little girls; they make me feel so good.

I love little girls; they make me feel so bad.

When they're around they make feel like I'm the only guy in town.

I love little girls; they make me feel so good."

"Mr. Flint!"

"I can't turn it off, Professor," Marcus said banging his head on the desk.

In the library

"I love little girls; they make me feel so good.

I love little girls; they make me feel so bad.

When they're around they make feel like I'm the only guy in town.

I love little girls; they make me feel so good."

"Mr. Flint!" Madame Prince yelled.

"YOU KNOW WHAT! IT'S FUCKIN TRUE! I GET IT MONTAGUE, WARRINGTON, PUECY!"

* * *

><p>106. Watch Twilight in Gryffindor Common Room.<p>

Gryffindor was watching Twilight in the common room for movie night.

"I'd rather die than stay away from you," Bella said to Edward in the movie.

"She needs to sort out her priorities," Ron said shaking his head.

Everyone nodded.

* * *

><p>107. Ask Luna why she's always happy.<p>

Malfoy was walking down the corridor. He frowned when he saw Luna skipping and happily humming a tune. Luna smiled when she saw Draco.

"Hello, Draco!" Luna said cheerfully. "It's such a beautiful day, isn't it?"

"Why are you always happy? How is it someone could always be happy twenty-four hours a day?"

Luna smiled and started rubbing his arm. "You could be happy too."

"How?"

She leaned into his ear. "I don't mind sharing some of the pot I get from Ravenclaw."

Malfoy's eyes widen. "Ravenclaw does..." His voice trailed off.

Luna giggled. "Of course! They're under so much stress! I just do way too much!"

Malfoy stared at her in shock.

Luna giggled again and kissed his nose before skipping away.

* * *

><p>108. Give Ernie a bj. <strong>(AN: Innocent Hufflepuffs)<strong>

Ernie frowned. "Hannah, I don't think you actually blow on it..."

* * *

><p>109. Knockout Harry Potter.<p>

Neville looked down at his passed out friend. "OH MY GOSH I KILLED HARRY FREAKING POTTER!"

Somewhere in the distance...

"NOOOO!" Voldemort cried. "I WANTED TO DO IT!"

With Neville.

"NOPE. ITS OKAY. HES STILL ALIVE!"

Somewhere in the distance.

"YAY!"

* * *

><p>110. Harry Potter pick up lines. <strong>(AN: I Didn't make these up)<strong>

The guys (Harry, Ron, Draco, Ernie, Marcus, Montague, Warrington, and Adrian) smirked when they saw the girls (Hermione, Ginny, Katie, Angelina, Alicia, Miles, Hannah, and Luna)

"Ginny, you must be a triwizard champion because my goblet is on fire." (Harry)

"Have you heard of Platform 9 and 3/4, Angelina? Wellllllll, I can think of something else with the exact same measurements." (Montague)

"Hey, Alicia, you don't need engorgio to enlarge this." (Warrington)

"Katie, the thought of you makes something vast and silvery erupt out of- Wait! Katie, comeback! It was a joke!" (Marcus)

"Hermione, you know the sorting hat placed me in Gryffindor. I think it's because like Godric Gryffindor, I too have an impressive sword." (Ron)

"Hey, Loony, a couple nights with me and Moaning Mrytle will have to get a new nickname." (Draco)

"Hannah, have you been using the petrificus totalus spell? Because you've made me stiff." (Ernie)

"Hey, Miles, I'd like to get my basilisk into your chamber of secrets." (Adrian)

"We're hitting on you," Harry said. "Do you want to get naked?"

"Can't," all the girls said.

"Why not?" Ron asked.

"Crookshanks has been having irregular nosebleeds."

(The guys were like O.O)

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Hey everyone whats up? Yeah its been awhile since I updated. Been kinda busy (Lazy) lately. This chapter isn't as funny as the last one, but I'll come up with other things... Yes Miles is still a girl (I might keep her that way) and yeah. Anyway, has everyone seen Part 2 of Deathly Hallows. FUCKIN AMAZING! If you haven't seen it watch it :). <strong>

**Umm... My next update is going to be awhile too. I'm going on a Youth For Christ (YFC) trip to Georgia and Alabama. I just have this to say. WTF IS IN GEORGIA AND ALABAMA? I'm sorry if you live there, but come on, there is nothing to do there! Anyway, I'll still be writing. I'll have my ipod touch and a journal :)**

**Anyway, please review this story and my story other story "Marcus" I have no reviews that story. Yeah its serious, but its cute and sweet, and I'm getting ready with a squel and that is going to be funny. Six words...**

**MARCUS AND KATIE HAVE FIVE DAUGHTERS**

**(Thats the only hint)**

**Oh and thanks for reading and reviewing :)**


	13. Chapter 13

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 111-120

**Disclaimer: Don't own HP**

111. Read Katie's diary.

"Bye, Marcus, I love you." Katie gave him a kiss and walked away.

Marcus smiled and looked at the empty chair...

Hello what's this? He picked up the small journal. Marcus grinned. Katie's diary. Hmmm... I wonder what she writes about me...

Marcus opened the diary. He was surprised to see the pages were blank!

What the?

Then writing appeared on the pages...

No, Katie I don't think you should marry Marcus and have kids at fourteen. It's not going to end well

-Tom

Marcus took out his quill and wrote...

I'm not Katie. I'm Marcus. Marcus Flint.

His words disappeared and were replaced with...

Hello, Marcus, I'm Tom Riddle... Katie's diary... And you're her boyfriend.

Marcus wrote...

Yes I am.

Tom's words appeared...

You do know you're eighteen and having sex with a fourteen-year-old girl makes you guilty of statutory rape... Which is kinda low, even for a Slytherin.

Marcus growled. "I'll show you low..."

In the diary...

Tom frowned. What is... EWWW! GROSS! EW! EW! EW! EWWWWW!

* * *

><p>112. Read Harry Potter fanfiction.<p>

Draco had his face buried into his hands crying, while Luna sat next to him, petting his hair. Harry, Ron, and Hermione came over.

"What's wrong with, Malfoy?" Harry asked.

"He read some fanfiction online," Luna said.

"IT WAS GAY!" Draco cried tearfully.** (AN: Pun?)**

Luna shook her head. "Not really, Draco. The ones with you and me were... Entertaining..."

"I need a computer," Hermione and Harry said.

* * *

><p>113. Steal Luna's pot. <strong>(AN: Think about it...)<strong>

"WHOS THE ASSHOLE WHO TOOK MY POT!"

* * *

><p>114. Make sure a dead body is really dead.<p>

"Do I dazzle you?" Edward asked Voldemort.

"You're still alive?"

* * *

><p>115. Kill the wrong Black.<p>

"I DID IT!" Bellatrix cried happily running to Voldemort. "I KILLED SIRIUS BLACK!"

Voldemort rolled his eyes. "You killed the wrong person... Again..."

"WHAT! YOU TOLD ME TO KILL BLACK! I KILLED SIRIUS BLACK!"

Voldemort took out his laptop and went on YouTube...

"... Which seat should I take?

It's Friday, Friday!

Getting down friday!

Everybody's looking forward to the weekend weekend

It's Friday Friday..."

"I meant Rebecca Black, Bellatrix."

Bellatrix frowned sadly. "Awww, crap... I can't believe I killed the wrong Black..."

* * *

><p>116. Cheat on Hermione Granger.<p>

"Ron, look out the window," Harry said.

Ron turned around. His eyes widen. "Oh no..."

There was a large billboard that read...

Dear Ron,

Do I have your attention now? I know all about her, you dirty, sneaky, immoral, unfaithful, poorly-endowed slimeball! Everything is caught on tape.

Sincerely, your (soon to be ex) girlfriend.

P.S: I paid for this billboard with our joint gringots account.

Harry grinned. "You're screwed... Now in large print."

"This is horrible," Ron said.

"I know."

"She spent all that money for a billboard..." **(AN: Hermione... She will do that)**

* * *

><p>117. Lick Ron's sandwich.<p>

Harry was sitting next to Ron in the Great Hall.

"Ron, I have to tell you something."

Ron sighed while he picked up his sandwich. "Did you have another threesome with my sister and girlfriend?"

"No, worse..."

"What?" Ron took a bite of his sandwich.

"I licked your sandwich."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

* * *

><p>118. Go on Bella Swan's facebook page.<p>

Bella Swan We'll be young forever 3

Comments

Edward Cullen: I know we will 3

Bella Swan: Oh I love you :)

Edward Cullen: I love you too :)

Lord Voldemort: Oh GAG. I mean, really? AVADA KEDAVRA! AVADA KEDAVRA!

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and Death Eaters like this

Harry Potter: I can't believe I'm saying this but... Go Voldemort!

Ron Weasley: I'm with Harry on this.

Hermione Granger: I couldn't agree more.

Bellatrix Lastrange: Wonderful, Voldemort! :)

Harry Potter: Twilight: Bringing all of the wizarding world together.

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and Death Eaters like this

* * *

><p>119. Do "something" to Katie's diary.<p>

"Angelina, I found Katie's diary!" Alicia said walking into the Great Hall.

"Where did you find it?"

"In the library." Alicia sat down and put the diary on the table.

Angelina picked it up. "Why's it wet?"

Alicia shrugged. "Someone might've spilt pumpkin juice. That's what it smells like."

Angelina opened it. "Hey, there's no writing in here!"

"What do you mean? It's a diary. I see Katie writing in it every day!"

"Look! The pages are blank!"

"Wait, what's that?"

Writing started to appear...

That was disgusting.

Angelina and Alicia looked nervously at each other before Angelina came up with an idea.

"Alicia, give me your quill." Angelina took Alicia's quill and wrote...

Who are you?

Her writing disappeared and was replaced with.

You're not Katie or Marcus.

Angelina wrote...

No. I'm Angelina and my friend Alicia is here. We're friends with Katie and Marcus.

Her writing disappeared...

Nice to meet you, Angelina, Alicia. My name is Tom Riddle... I'm Katie's Diary... Can you do something for me?

Angelina wrote...

Sure, I guess.

Tom wrote...

Can you tell Marcus not to piss in the diary...?

* * *

><p>120. Ask my friends about what Ginny gave me. <strong>(AN: Yay! I made it to 120. I think this is the longest one.)<strong>

Luna looked at the small, square, purple, package in her hand. Ginny gave it to her, but she didn't tell her what it was. Luna decided to ask her schoolmates.

She smiled when she saw Harry, Ron, and Hermione. Luna walked up to them smiling cheerfully.

"Hello, Harry, Ron, Hermione!"

"Hello, Luna."

"I need your help." Luna held out the purple package. "Ginny gave this to me but I don't know what it is."

Harry blushed. "That's... Something, Luna."

"Oh my!" Hermione said laughing herself to tears.

Ron looked angry. "Damnit! Ginny!" He took off down the hall bright red with Harry and Hermione running after him, trying to calm him down.

Weird, Luna thought. She shrugged and happily skipped away deciding to ask someone else.

"Hello, Luna!"

Luna smiled at Hannah and Ernie. "Hello!" She walked over. "Do you two have any idea what this is?" Luna held up the package.

Hannah stared at it in utter confusion. "I don't know. Have you seen something like this before, Ernie?"

Ernie shook his head. "No, I never seen something like that."

"Sorry we couldn't help, Luna."

Luna smiled. "It's all right. I'll keep asking around." She skipped away and went outside to the courtyard where she saw Angelina and Graham Montague.

"Angelina, Graham! How are you doing today?"

"Good! How are you, Luna?"

"I'm great but, I need help with something..."

"Maybe we could be of some service."

"Can you tell me what this is, then?" She showed them the package.

Montague's face fell and Angelina took notice. Luna noticed, Angelina looked angry.

"You still didn't buy any!" Angelina yelled at Montague before walking away.

Montague followed after her. "I promise I'll buy some this weekend!"

Luna sighed. Will anybody tell me what this is?

"Luna!"

She smiled when she saw Katie, Alicia, Marcus, and Warrington.

"More friends!"

"Hi, Loony," Marcus smirked.

"Marcus, be nice," said Katie.

Marcus kissed her cheek.

"I was wondering what this is? Do all of you know?"

The group stared at the purple thing in her hand...

"I have no idea," Katie said. "I never seen anything like that."

Marcus rolled his eyes and gently took Katie's hand. "Let's go, Katie. I need to explain a few things." They walked away leaving Luna with Alicia and Cassius.

Alicia sighed and turned to Warrington. "I just remembered... That... I'm pregnant..." **(AN: O.O See author's note at the end)**

Warrington's eyes widen. "Wait. Are you serious this time?"

"Yes."

Warrington started to runaway, Alicia running after him.

"Cassius, comeback! We need to get married." **(AN: Picture that)**

Luna stood there confused. Everyone that I showed it to, made everyone act weird. Then a thought came into her head.

It's cursed!

Why would Ginny give her something cursed? Luna rushed to the library. She pulled out some books that talked about cursed objects, and tried to match it up to the pictures, but she couldn't find anything. Luna leaned back in her chair, not sure what to do next.

"Hey, Loony!"

Luna smiled when she looked up and saw Draco Malfoy coming to sit next to her.

"Hello, Draco! How are you today?"

He ignored her question and looked at the books that were in front of her.

"Why are you reading about curses?"

"Because of this!" Luna showed him the purple, cursed object, making Draco's eyes widen in surprise. "It's cursed! It's been making everyone act strange!"

Draco took it from her and grinned. "Calm down, Loony. I know what this is and I assure you, it is not cursed, but it does have some magic that can only be used once."

"Really?"

Draco smirked. "Yes, and I can show you how it's used. Would you like to come with me back to dormitory? No one will be there right now."

Luna jumped out of her seat and grabbed his hand. "Let's go, then! I want you to show me how the magic is used."

Draco stood up and followed her out of the library, still wearing his playful smirk.

Yes. Condoms were, indeed, magical...

**AN: Yes, Malfoy, condoms are indeed magical, they prevent certain things. Perhaps we should tell Cassius about these things. Anyway, yeah Alicia is pregnant. At first I thought it should be Marcus and Katie, but I realized two things, 1. I'm writing a story where Marcus and Katie are all grown up and have 5 daughters and 2. Marcus is 18 in this and Katie is 14... That is self explanatory lol. Ummm... I don't know why I picked Alicia and Warrington. Now that I'm thinking about it Miles being pregnant would probably be more funny (Hmmm...). Anyway read and review.**

**New Story: "Wish." Its a Draco and Luna story. I just recently got into this pairing :)**

**As you can see I'm back from that "lovely" trip to Georgia and Alabama. It was okay. The adults were fighting, there was so much unnecessary drama and bullshit, and there was so much tension, you could sense it if you walked into a room. I had fun but it was just... I can't describe it. What really bothered me was, I couldn't be alone, like by myself trying to cool down. I couldn't think! I was constantly in a group! I was constantly surrounded by people! I'm sorry if this sounds immature but, I wanted quiet time, just to think, and analyze myself just to see if I was okay. Its no wonder that I broke down crying on sunday because of all the stress. I'm glad I'm home, everything in somewhat okay, but between after what went on on the trip, nothing else is the same. I'm more rebellious then I use to be.**

**I wasn't lying when I said I was constantly surrounded by people. We were in 7 seater vans. There were 4 four vans and 7 people in each. In our hotel rooms, we were always under supervision. Even if I wanted to be alone, I couldn't unless I wanted to runaway (which I thought about). Everything was so fast paced, and it was like we were always rushing, always in a hurry...**

**If I go on trips, I want to go by myself from now one so all that can't happen. When I'm alone on a trip, I can always think, always clear my head, always think straight. No drama, no bullshit, just me. I can take things slow and rest when I need it. Its so much easier if it was like that...**


	14. Chapter 14

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 121-130

121. Make fun of Draco's patronus.

"Okay, Draco," Harry said, "Remember Expecto Patronum. Say it loud and clear."

Draco smirked. "I bet my patronus will be a dragon."

"We'll see." Harry rolled his eyes.

Draco held up his wand. "EXPECTO PATRONUM!"

A bright, white light shot out of his wand, and took shape of...

"A FERRET!" Harry said laughing a long with the rest of DA.

Draco blushed. "Shut up! So what if it's a ferret?"

"It's the cutest patronus ever," Cho said.

"Cuter then Katie's jackalope patronus," Ron added.

"Shut up!" Katie yelled. "My jackalope patronus is cute."

"Hey, look!" Hermione pointed to the the ferret. "He bounces!"

"Awwww!" DA sighed as Luna walked into the room.

"Oh! I get it now!" Luna cried happily. "I understand why Draco is called the Amazing Bouncing Ferret!"

* * *

><p>122. Make a gender bending jackalope. <strong>(AN: When Miles is pretending to be a boy)<strong>

"Adrian, Miles, look at this!" Katie held up the jackalope.

"A jackalope," Adrian said.

"You make a thousand of those a day," Miles said.

"Yeah, but it's not just a jackalope. It's a gender bending jackalope!"

"Gender bending," Miles started.

"Jackalope?" Adrian finished.

The jackalope opened it's mouth... "BWAAA!"

SEX CHANGE!

Adrian looked down seeing he had breast then looked instantly at Miles, who didn't change at all. Miles coughed.

Adrian raised his hand. "I don't think it works very well."

* * *

><p>123. I will not hit on unknown cats.<p>

Crookshanks was wandering around Hogwarts until he saw a grey female cat. He walked over to her. Tonight really was his night.

"Hey babe, what's up?"

The female cat looked at him. "You're Crookshanks, right?"

"Yeah. My owner is Hermione. Hermione Granger."

"I know her."

"Good. Who's your owner? And what's your name?"

"McGonagall."

"Your owner is Professor McGonagall. Cool, but what your name?"

"That is my name. I'm in my animagus form..."

In Gryffindor Common Room...

"Hey, Hermione, do you know what's wrong with Crookshanks?" Ginny asked. "He's been throwing up ever since he came in."

"Maybe he has a cold," Harry suggested watching the cat walk to the girl's dorms. "Did you see him shiver?"** (AN: Lol)**

* * *

><p>124. Tell Padma about Theodore Nott's father. <strong>(AN: I know right. Random couple... New couple I'm experimenting with.)<strong>

Padma stomped angrily to the Slytherin Dungeon. Why didn't her boyfriend tell her about his father? Then again, why didn't she realize it? He never talked about his father and wouldn't let her meet him. She could've figured it out.

When Padma got to the the portrait, she said the password and walked in. She saw her boyfriend sitting by the fireplace with his friends.

"Theodore Nott!"

"Hi, Padma. How are you?" Theodore said greeting her with a smile.

"Why didn't you tell me about your father?"

His eyes widen and he placed his hands on her shoulders. "Padma, I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want to lose you because of it."

"Why would you lose me? I fully understand your father and his situation."

"You do?"

Padma smiled and hugged him. "Yes, Theodore... You're father is gay and has a gay lover. I'm okay with that..."

"Ahhhh," the students in the Slytherin Common Room groaned out.

* * *

><p>125. Follow whatever the guys are doing.<p>

Crookshanks was walking down the hallway and saw the guys looking into a room. He walked over and saw...

Professor McGonagall naked!

Crookshanks took off to Gryffindor Common Room. Must find place to throw up!

* * *

><p>126. I will not throw up in Katie's Diary.<p>

Crookshanks looked around Gryffindor Common Room.

Where to throw up? Where to throw up? Ah, Katie Bell's diary. Whatever you put in there disappears forever!

Crookshanks opened the diary and...

In the Diary...

"What the fuck is this?" Tom asked looking at the stuff that fell on him.

* * *

><p>127. Scream like a girl.<p>

Katie walked into Snape's classroom. "Professor, here's my jackalope potion- Whoops!" Katie tripped and potion fell on Snape, turning him into a jackalope. "AHHHHHHHH!" Katie shrieked.

Marcus walked in. "Katie, what's- AHHH! KATIE WHAT DID YOU DO TO SNAPE!"

"I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING! IT WAS THE POTION!"

Alicia and Warrington walked in.

"AHHHHHHHH!"

"Alicia, calm down!" Marcus yelled.

"That was Warrington!"

Marcus groaned. "Ahhhh..."

* * *

><p>128. Play "The Game" during a quidditch game. <strong>(AN: We all know "the Game" right? By the way, if your reading this, you just lost the game.)<strong>

"It's a great day for quidditch!" Luna said happily into the megaphone. "But before we begin I want all of you to know... I LOST THE GAME!"

"DAMNIT!" Everyone in the stadium groaned out.

* * *

><p>129. Tell everyone about Sirius Black's daughter.<p>

"Welcome back to another year at Hogwarts!" Dumbledore said happily. "But before we begin, I would like to introduce, Sirius Black's daughter, Rebecca."

A dark hair girl stepped out with music playing behind her. "Which seat should I take?"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"FUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKKKK!"

* * *

><p>130. Ask Sirius about his daughter.<p>

"Why didn't you tell us you had a daughter?" Harry asked.

"I didn't want you to find out!"

"Nobody was suppose to find out," Remus said looking up from his newspaper.

"I didn't want to have a daughter!" Sirius said.

"Then why did you sleep with that woman?" Tonks asked.

"I swear to Merlin, it was a one night stand!"

Harry rolled his eyes. "Why did it have to be Rebecca Black?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Hey everyone whats up? Yeah its been a long time since I updated this story. I wasn't being lazy (for once) I actually couldn't think of anything funny for this storylist. It took me awhile to come up with ideas, and after the Georgia/Alabama trip, I kinda lost my sense of humor for awhile. But its starting to comeback its just being really slow. This chapter isn't really funny, and I was kinda in a rush to finish it. Its like, when you write something, and then you have writer block, and you just want to get it done because you keep seeing it and its a pain in the ass lol. I really hope you can understand that, its the only good example I have. **

**My other story "The Fun Lives of Marcus and Katie," I updated it today, and "Wish" which is a Draco/Luna fic will be updated tomorrow or monday. So keep on the look out. **

**Thank and read and review**

**Ohhh and I got a laptop... My first laptop (Sony) ever... So I'm happy and I'm breaking it in :) No, I'm not actually breaking it, slow people lol :)**


	15. Chapter 15

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 131-140

131. Do a That's What She Said joke while Harry is giving a speech.

"If we're going to fuck up Voldemort, we're going to fuckin do it right!"

"That's what she said!" Said Fred and George...

At Sirius Black's House...

Tonks looked out the window at the large explosion. She turned to Remus and Sirius and said, "It must be pretty epic barbecue."

* * *

><p>132. Question Bellatrix about her love life.<p>

"HOLY FUCK!" Bellatrix cried. "DID YOU SEE THAT EXPLOSION! SOMEONE MUST BE HAVING AN EPIC BARBECUE!"

Rodolphus Lastrange rolled his eyes. "Soooo... You love Voldemort more than me?"

Bellatrix glared at him...

At Hogwarts...

Katie looked out the window of Gryffindor Common Room at the large explosion. She smiled at Marcus. "That must be an awesome barbecue."

* * *

><p>133. Make fun of Draco's gift from his father.<p>

"Hey, Malfoy, what's with pimp cane?" Harry asked.

"Shut up, Potter! It's a cane, not a pimp cane!"

"Hey, Malfoy, did you steal your father's pimp cane?" Ron asked walking over to the two.

"It's a gift, Weasley! It's not a pimp cane! And My father still has his!"

"Wow, Malfoy," Hermione started. "You inherited your father's pimp cane. Your mother must be very proud." **(AN: Oh Hermione lol)**

"IT'S NOT A PIMP CANE!"

"Mr. Malfoy, please put away your father's pimp cane," said Snape walking by the group.

Draco sighed. "Yes sir..."

* * *

><p>134. Call Draco, "Pimp Junior."<strong> (AN: Lol)<strong>

"Hey, Draco," Harry said.

"Hello, Harry."

"Hello, Draco," said Hermione.

"Hi, Hermione."

Ron grinned. "Hello... Pimp Junior..."

At the Quidditch Field...

"Hey, look!" Katie said to Angelina and Alicia, pointing at the explosion coming from Hogwarts.

Alicia sighed. "What is with all the barbecues lately?"

* * *

><p>135. Have a barbecue at Hogwarts. <strong>(AN: Explosions are called barbecues if you haven't realized it)<strong>

Katie walked over to where her friends were eating outside, and where Montague was standing by a grill. Alicia waved her over.

"What the fuck is this?" Katie asked.

"A picnic," said Angelina.

BOOM!

The grill exploded.

"Now... It's a barbecue," said Alicia.

* * *

><p>136. Go to the Yule Ball with Ron Weasley. <strong>(AN: This isn't a funny one. Its actually cute. I just wanted to put in some Theodore and Padma romance. So this one will make you say, Awww.)<strong>

Padma tearfully left the Yule Ball and was sitting on the steps trying hard to hold back her tears. Ron paid more attention to Hermione than her. He barely talked to her, and didn't dance with her. Right now, she felt lonely, and started crying harder.

Through her tears and sobbing she didn't hear someone coming down the steps, and sitting next to her. When she looked up, she saw Theodore Nott. He put his arms around her.

"You should've went with me, Padma," he said softly. "I would only look at you. And you would be happy with me."

Padma wiped her away her tears and smiled. "You're here now, Theodore... You are all I need." She pressed her lips to his, and she sighed when he kissed her back.

* * *

><p>137. Let Justin Bieber be sorted into Hogwarts. <strong>(AN: Someone gave me an idea for this, but I forgot their name. Sorry. Well, this is for you.)<strong>

Professor McGonagall looked at the list. "Bieber, Justin... Really?" She looked at Dumbledore. "Really?"

The Sorting Hat looked at Justin Bieber as he sat down. The hat turned to McGonagall. "Really?"

McGonagall put the hat on Justin Bieber's head. "Sorry, Hat."

The sorting hat sighed. "Let's see... Very difficult... I can't put you in Slytherin..."

Slytherin table let out a sigh of relief.

"You're too stupid for Ravenclaw..."** (AN: True)**

Ravenclaw table sighed happily.

"You... Have no balls so you can't be in Gryffindor..." **(AN: Lol hahahahahaha)**

Gryffindor table was relieved.

"Sooo... I guess it would be... HUFFLEPUFF!" **(AN: For once I feel sorry for them)**

"WHAT THE FUCK!" Hufflepuff table cried.

"WHAT THE FUCK!" Helga Hufflepuff's voice cried out.

* * *

><p>138. Refer to Lucius Malfoy as Pimp Senior. <strong>(AN: He has a pimp cane! Do I really need to explain it? Lol)<strong>

Harry walked over to Draco. "Hey, Draco, how's Pimp Senior?"

"You mean my father, right?"

"Yeah."

"He's fine," Draco said with a sigh.

* * *

><p>139. Tell father about his new nickname.<p>

Draco sent a letter to his father...

Everyone is calling you, "Pimp Senior."

-Draco

In the afternoon, he got a letter from his father...

That's because I am.

-Lucius "Pimp Senior" Malfoy

Draco sent another letter...

Does mom know?

-Draco

His father sent another letter...

No...

-Lucius "Pimp Senior" Malfoy

An few minutes later Draco got another letter from his father...

Correction... She knows now...

-Lucius "I'm screwed big time" Malfoy... **(AN :P)**

* * *

><p>140. Ask Theodore Nott about his father's gay lover. <strong>(AN: Lets end this with Theodore and a barbecue)<strong>

"So, Theodore... Who is your father's gay lover?" Draco asked...

In Gryffindor Common Room...

Katie smiled while looking out the window. She turned to Marcus. "Hey, Marcus, look!"

"What is it?"

"Another barbecue."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: What's up everyone? Yeah this is a fast update. This chapter is probably the shortest I wrote this storylist. And yeah it was repetative with all the barbecues but I like barbecues lol. Anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter. About the Theodore and Padma romance part. I had the thought in my head and I really wanted to write so I did :)**

**Sooo yeah... Read and review and I hope you read "Wish" and "The Fun Lives of Marcus and Katie." And if you have read them you might've noticed my Author's Notes aren't long. I just want to let you know there probably won't be any notes on the stories ("Wish" and "Fun Lives of Marcus and Katie"). My authors notes for those two stories will be on this story. So look here for any (if there are any) notes about those stories on the next chapter of this story. :)**

**Thanks reading :)**


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: Don't own HP**

**AN: See Author's Note (AN) at the end. I got a lot to say. :)**

Things I Will Not Do At Hogwarts 141-150

141. Put a boggart in the boys room.

"You sure the guys will be scared?" Angelina asked Katie.

"Yeah its a boggart."

"Quick!" Alicia said. "They're coming! Under the invisibility cloak!"

"How did you get this, Katie?"

"I told Harry I wanted to make jackalopes invisible."

"And..."

"It was awesome."

"Shhhh!"

Marcus, Montague, and Warrington walked into their room and...

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

The girls ran in and saw the guys huddled in the corner and Michael Jackson dancing in the middle of the room.

"WHAT THE FUCK!" Alicia cried.

"THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE ALL SCARED OF!" Angelina asked. "MICHAEL JACKSON!"** (AN: I knew someone who was scared of Michael Jackson)**

"GET RID OF IT!"

* * *

><p>142. Let Lavender make clothes for Dumbledore's Army.<p>

"Hey, everyone, I made jackets, scarves, socks, shirts, and pants!" Lavender said happily.

"Why are they all pink?" Harry asked.

"Because they are all out of powder baby blue,"

"I'm surprised you didn't make underwear," Seamus said.

Dean smacked him and Parvati was banging her head against the table.

"Why?" Parvati cried. "Why would you suggest that?"

"Thats a great idea!" Lavender said happily. "I'll get started on that." She ran up to the girl's room.

"Thanks, Seamus," Dean said. "Now we're going to have to wear pink, itchy underwear."

Parvati shivered.

* * *

><p>143. Bother Parvati while she's on her date with Dean Thomas.<p>

"What movie are we watching?" Parvati asked curling up next to Dean.

"'The Titanic.'"

"I love that movie!" Parvati shrieked. "How did you know?"

"Padma told me."

"Oh... She's a great sister..."

Dean smiled and kissed the top of her head. The movie started. Dean sighed. Best night ever...

"HEY, YOU TWO! WHATCHA WATCHING!"

Dean and Parvati instantly pulled a part and looked at Lavender who now sat in between them.

Parvati sighed. "We're watching the 'Titanic.'"

"Cool! I love that movie."

Parvati gave him apologetic look. So much for romantic date.

A Few Minutes Later...

"WAAAAAHHHHH!" Lavender cried. "THAT IS SO SAD! I CAN'T BELIEVE HE DIES!"

Parvati and Dean stood up quietly and walked to the boy's dorm rolling their eyes...

* * *

><p>144. Convince Lavender to run down the hallways naked.<p>

"So you're going to do it with me?" Lavender asked.

"Yeah," Parvati said.

"Really?"

"Yeah... Now on three... One... Two... Three!"

"GO GRYFFINDOR!" Lavender yelled throwing off her robe and running naked down the crowded hallway.

Parvati grinned and held back a laugh, as she saw Dean and Seamus.

"Parvati," Dean asked carefully, "Why is Lavender running through the hallways of Hogwarts naked as the day she was born?"

"Gryffindor team won yesterday. We're celebrating."

"How come you're not doing it?" Seamus asked

"Ginny said it would be embarrassing."

"And..."

"She was right."

"I think you should do it, Parvati," Dean said.

"If I couldn't convince Luna Lovegood to do it, what makes you think you can convince me?"

Before he could answer, Luna came skipping towards them. "Hey, did you all see Lavender Brown? Someone should give back her clothes." She giggled. "But she's brave, I could never do that. It would be too embarrassing. Anyway, bye! I have to meet Draco now. I wonder if he saw Lavender... Well, bye!" She skipped off.

"See, even Loony Lovegood thinks thats embarrassing."

* * *

><p>145. Let Dumbledore see Lavender Brown streak through the halls.<p>

"Good morning, Parvati, Dean, Seamus."

"Good morning sir."

"I just saw Miss. Lavender Brown running down the hall naked. I must ask... Is it naked day already?" **(AN: Yay Naked Day! Lol)**

Their expressions were like O.O

* * *

><p>146. Ask Hermione about Naked Day.<p>

Hermione sighed. "Salazar Slytherin told Godric Gryffindor, after their quidditch team lost to Gryffindor, that it was Naked Day. Godric walked around Hogwarts naked, and he declared it was officially Naked Day to avoid further embarrassment."

"Wow," said Parvati, Seamus, and Dean.

"Yeah. Now will you please tell Lavender to put her clothes on?"

* * *

><p>147. Tell Fred and George about Naked Day. <strong>(AN: If you think about it, they would do it anyway)<strong>

"Hello, Professor McGonagall," said Fred.

"How are you doing today?" George asked.

McGonagall frowned when she saw the two naked boys. She rolled her eyes. "Who told the Weasleys about naked day?"

* * *

><p>148. Yell at Parvati while she's taking a shower.<p>

"PARVATI!" Dean yelled into the girl's dorm from the common room.

"WHAT!"

"GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW! WE NEED TO TALK!"

"Uhhh... Now?"

"YEAH! NOW!"

"I'm kinda busy! Can this wait?"

"NO! I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE BUSY! GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW."

"Okay, if you insist."

A few seconds later a very wet and naked Parvati came down and stood in front of Dean. All the Gryffindors turned to look at Parvati. Their eyes were wide and there mouths were open. Dean found his voice.

"WHY ARE YOU NAKED?" Dean asked in shock.

Parvati casually crossed her arms under her breast. "Someone took my towel and I don't know what happened to it... So what do you want, Dean?"

His eyes traveled up and down her body. "Uhhh... I wanted to spend more time with you..."

Parvati shrugged and took his hand. "You could've just asked," she said as she lead him to the boy's dorm.

* * *

><p>149. Ask Dean why he smells like lavender and jasmine.<p>

Dean tiredly came down the stairs and sat next to Seamus.

"Why do you smell like jasmine and lavender?" Seamus asked.

The two Gryffindor girls, Jazmine and Lavender, looked at him.

"Sorry ladies," said Seamus.

"It's Parvati. She smells like jasmine and lavender," said Dean.

"Sooo... Parvati had sex with Jazmine and Lavender, then it rubbed off on you?"

Jazmine and Lavender gave them confused looks. Dean rolled his eyes and stood up. He whacked Seamus behind the head and walked back to his room.

* * *

><p>150. Let Lavender make underwear.<p>

Lavender ran into the Room of Requirements holding a box. "HEY GUYS GUESS WHAT I MADE!"

"What?" Hermione asked nervously.

"THE UNDERWEAR!"

"Yay," said DA hesitantly as Lavender handed them out.

"Well, put them on," Lavender said when she finished handing them out.

Everyone looked at Harry. Harry walked over to Parvati and whispered, "Do we have to?"

"Sadly, yes."

"What's the worst that can happen if we say no?" Asked Hermione.

Parvati sighed and placed a hand on Hermione's shoulder. "Remember what happened the last time she cried."

Hermione's eyes widen and she turned to Harry grasping his shoulders. "Harry, if you love me and if you really are my best friend, you would tell everyone to put them on."

Harry sighed and said, "All right, let's all go to the bathroom put these on."

"Harry-" said Cho.

"No, Cho, we have to do it..."

FIVE MINUTES LATER...

WITH THE GIRLS...

"How do they fit?" Lavender asked.

"They fit great," Parvati said faking a smile.

"These are so itchy!" Katie whined to Angelina and Alicia.

"I chose a really bad time to shave down there," Cho whispered to Padma.

"Same here," Padma agreed. "I really want to scratch there, but it would look so un-lady like."

"Don't scratch," said Ginny. "It'll make it worse."

"I hope the guys are okay," said Hermione.

WITH THE GUYS...

"Damn, this underwear is itching me in places you don't want to know," said Dean.

"I really want to scratch," said Ernie.

"Don't scratch," Colin warned. "I heard Ginny say, it will make it worse."

"Harry, I hope you have a plan to get us out of this," said Ron. "None of us want to wear itchy underwear."

"Don't worry, Ron," said Harry. "I have a plan, but let's get back to the Room of Requirements."

When everyone made it back to the Room of Requirements, Lavender smiled happily.

"I MADE MORE!" Said Lavender pointing to the boxes. "EACH OF YOU WILL HAVE SEVEN! ONE FOR EVERY DAY OF THE WEEK!"

DA turned to Harry, who rolled his eyes.

"Harry," Cho moaned hopelessly.

"I will not wear these every fuckin day," Parvati whispered angrily.

Harry sighed. "I'll come up with another plan, I promise."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: What's up everyone? I hope everyone is doing well in school, and I hope none of you are stressing out too much. :) Or else you'll be handling you're stress by drinking ice coffee every day lol. <strong>

**I can't remember the last time I updated this story (Lately, I been doing a lot of one-shots). Well, as you can see, this was mainly about Parvati, Lavender, Seamus, and Dean. I mostly did it this way because I like Parvati just as much as Katie. I don't really like Lavender, which was why I made fun of her in this, but to be honest I feel really bad for her :(. We all seen Deathly Hallows Part 2, right? Okay, remember the scene when Fenir Greyback was eating someone, then later on we see it was Lavender. I remember seeing that, and saying outloud, Shiiiitttt! I can't be the only one who thought that scene was... disturbing... ****I instantly felt bad for Parvati because that was like her best friend, and that kinda sucks that she lost her best friend.**

**Another thing is, there was a scene where Padma and Professor Trelawney were sitting together and they pulled a blanket over someone who died. I saw dark skin and I thought it was Parvati who died! I thought, wow, that just sucks! Why do that to Padma? Their sisters, twin sisters! Thats sooo not cool! But then I found out, the actress who played Parvati wasn't in the movie, sooo... Who did they pull the blanket over if it wasn't Parvati?**

**Some other things I noticed is Padma and Parvati are in the same house. They're both in Gryffindor and you can tell by their tie, I guess. And they seem closer in the movies then in the books, but yeah, you gotta love them :). And to me Parvati seems smarter than Lavender, and Padma... Is smarter than the two of them put together lol :).**

**Well... Thanks for reading, and please review :)**

**Please read my new funny story, "Naked Time." Its exactly how it sounds lol :).**


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